The Plan

“It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

Remember that some days you will not be capable of doing things, but you will always have days that you can. On the days that you can create a strategic plan to guide you during the days you cannot.

We refer to it as good days and bad days but the truth is you can have many levels of pain and /or symptoms in one day. The terms good and bad encompass a multitude of layers.  I am keeping the metaphor of the rain from ‘The Unwelcomed Guest’ for my plan and naming them after levels of a storm.

This plan is designed to be dynamic and adaptable. It serves as a living framework that can be continuously refined, expanded and adjusted. Its evolving nature ensures it remains relevant and effective over time.

I started with Violent because that is heaviest and most important time for me to have a plan. 

Violent Pain Leval 7-10

Overwhelming experience where pain feels unrelenting and intense. Everything is unbearable, coping strategies do not exist, it is cruel, debilitating and disrupting to both physical and emotional well-being. Depression is at its worst on these days.  I am lost in my own suffering, consumed by my pain and lost in my own misery.

The goal is to create a go to list that requires no effort or thought on a Violent day.  It is essential to compile these specific lists on a light or moderate day and make the lists readily accessible.  This way everything is prepared in advance and you can focus on just getting through the day.

• Read the love letter you wrote to yourself to help you cope with today.

I know today is one of those days that we have battled through many times. The kind where the pain feels like it is taking over everything.  I know how exhausting, frustrating and isolating it can feel when your body is screaming and nothing seems to help. But I want you to know that it’s okay to feel exactly how you’re feeling right now.  You don’t have to pretend to be strong or push through. You don’t have to justify your need for rest or comfort. You are allowed to just be.

Remember you are so much more than what you are experiencing right now. Give yourself grace and don’t be too hard on yourself.  If all you can do today is breathe and exist that is okay. Take care of yourself in whatever way feels right. Whether that is resting, crying, distracting yourself, simply sitting with your feelings or if you just zombie out

Remember it might not feel like it right now but I promise there is a life that is worth living and days ahead that are joyous and fun.  You are loved, valued and deserving of peace and there will be plenty of days to enjoy, accomplish things and create.

You are doing the best you can and that is enough.

• Put on Comfort Clothes

• Give yourself permission to feel bad and just be

• Watch a movie or TV show

  The goal is to find fun, unchallenging shows that you can easily drift in and out of, providing a comforting distraction without requiring any serious commitment. Shows that are just easy to enjoy without needing to follow complex plots. Create a list on a good day to refer so you have it to review on days like today.

                TV show Death in Paradise

• Listen to music

• Make a play list just for this kind of day.  Find songs that evoke positive memories for you. Maybe childhood songs, the ones you listened to in your teens, some classics and your favorite all time songs.             

• Make a warm drink     

        Have options on hand, maybe a special Tea, coffee or hot cocoa 

• Take an Epsom Salt Bath 

• Have a Sauna 

• Have a special treat

          Have a special stash that is only for days like today.            

                  Trader Joes Dinner Mac and Cheese

                  Trader Joes Chocolate Cake with the gooey center

                  Dr. Pepper

                  Ice Cream Sandwich 

• Have something healthy to eat

  Have healthy and easy food options on hand for days like today

                  Protein bars and drinks                  Favorite microwave meals

                  When you make a favorite meal but a serving in the freezer to have on hand to easily prepare 

• Exercise is most likely impossible on these days, just let it go

Heavy Pain Level 4-6

High pain levels and everything is more challenging. I often find myself seeking distractions and pushing myself too hard.  During these times I also prefer to avoid communication and interacting with others. I can be focused on my own suffering, consumed by my pain and lost in my own misery.

• Remember to try and not be so lost in my own misery

• Communicate with Kevin, listen to his needs and give him attention. 

• Your body needs REST

•                 Watch a TV show

•                 Take a Nap

•                 Listen to a hypnosis tape

•                 Take an Epsom salt bath 

• Use pain patches

• Take Tylenol regularly throughout the day do not just suffer through it 

• Be careful of distractions and don’t overdo it. 

• Paint 

• Write 

• Do something outside 

• Go shopping 

• Exercise

  Take a walk

  Do some rows

• Take a shower

Moderate Pain Level 2-3

Functionable and capable of communicating and completing tasks. This is the time to catch up on all things that have been put aside for the Violent and Heavy Days.

• Enjoy life and have some fun

• Do not spend so much time catching up that you lose track of the really important things. 

• Do fun activities with someone you love

• Pay bills and do financial tasks

• Return calls and emails

• Write

• Work on projects

• Exercise

         Anything you want

          Yoga

          Longer walk

          Bike ride

          Try pickleball

• Write a letter to yourself to read on the days that are Violent, a love letter, make it personal and remind yourself the day will pass and give yourself permission for any way you feel and encouragement to not let it destroy you.  Write these letters as often as you would like.

• Create a list of movies and TV shows to watch that is all about simplicity. The goal is to find fun, unchallenging shows that you can easily drift in and out of, providing a comforting distraction without requiring any serious commitment. Shows that are just easy to enjoy without needing to follow complex plots.

• Make a play list just for this kind of day.  Find songs that evoke positive memories for you. Maybe childhood songs, the ones you listened to in your teens, some classics and your favorite all time songs.

  
  

Light   Pain Level below 2

A rare and extraordinary day. Revel in all its glory.